Day 19

Richard B has agreed to come help lay the oak floor. Wonderful man and a wonderful help as halfway into the morning the hospital calls with a last minute appointment at 1pm to see Dr Awan a general surgeon who wants to talk to me about opening up my chest!  Dr K has chased him I think – well done! So Richard drives me up and back and then we crack on with the building works. A busy day. More calls coming in from friends but it’s easier to handle it today I’m not so tearful.

In the late afternoon Dr Anyanwy calls from ENT wondering if the hospital has contacted me. I explain my visit to see Dr Awan earlier and that it seems that’s the way we are going.  I like this gentle giant of a doctor. He’s got a calming voice and has been very nice to me.

Richard leaves late afternoon to meet friends for a drink back in St Just. I’m alone and potter on with the window repairs then cook some supper, talk to Alison on the phone and get onto the computer til quite late. Unfortunately although I get out my night dose of cocodamols I fall asleep before taking them so wake at 4am with a screaming back. Gulp down the drugs and breath … Then as it calms down I find some lovely Morton Feldman tracks on YouTube which are peaceful and eventually I sleep til about 7 when I wake in a hot sweat.

Call Ali whose at the cafe preparing food for the day. And lie in bed writing this journal and eating rice flakes with goats milk and Jane L’s raspberry jam…